Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Randomize
