Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
