Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Randomize
