I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Randomize
