i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
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