Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
