Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
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