Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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