I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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