Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
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