i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
