soooo we both peed the bed last night...
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize
