i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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