whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
