im about as happy as oj after his trial
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
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