I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
