Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize
