i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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