u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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