So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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