Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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