Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize
