just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
I am mentally ready for anal.
Randomize
