so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
