is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
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