My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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