Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
Operation Purity has been aborted
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
