I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
Randomize
