ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
Randomize
