whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
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