fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
