I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Last time i carry you out of a forest
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
its liver damage thursday
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
