sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
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