Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
