remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
