Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
two words: eviction party
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize
