Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
All the doctor said was why
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
