Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize