if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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