fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
