Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
My vagina is very pro this idea
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Randomize
