office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
