I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
