he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize
