im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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