hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
She is in my trunk
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Randomize
