i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
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