All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
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