I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
