Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Such a big mess for such a small penis
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
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