Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Randomize
