i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Randomize
